Dear Child of Mine-
While you are still only 10, I’m realizing the more you grow up the faster the growing portion goes. I fear for the age of 16 and I’m left daily with a whole new set of fears that my friends can’t even fathom with their wee babies yet. You and I are put in a group apart from so many so I always feel the need to make sure I don’t forget anything with you.
There is always that fear in the back of my head that something may happen to me and then you will be left drinking Boone’s Farm wine at the age of 25, with no degree and dating a guy named Stryker. I know your Dad could handle most things but lets face it, you would just end up dating a baseball player that drives a too fast Mustang.
Just in case, here are some things I want you to keep in mind:
- High school is a very short time in your life and most people don’t miss it. Get to know the nerds, the popular girls and everyone in between but they all change when reality hits and that time does not define who you are.
- Go to college, get a degree. I know you can survive in this life without a degree but it sure does make it easier to have one. Plus, college is amazing. People are more accepting and the world officially starts opening up to you. Don’t choose a major your freshman year but live in the dorms. Never share a room with your best friend, it will hurt your friendship no matter what you think.
- Not everyone is doing it. And by doing it, I mean sex. You’ll know when it is right and I’m not saying it has to be one your wedding night. Just use your brain, use protection and don’t use it to get your way. Your Dad and I have a great story for our first time. Ask us about it. Just remember that was college, not high school.
- Don’t chase a man. They should chase you a bit. Never stay with a man who you don’t feel protected by, safe with or loved. Don’t ever make excuses for a man either. Just because he is in a band or owns a motorcycle does not make him worthy of a make out session.
- Stay out all night with a man. Watch both the sunset with him and sunrise but if you are ignoring your curfew I will find you.
- Before you marry make sure you have a conversation about kids, career paths and finances.
- It is okay to fall in love and have your heart-broken because this is how you learn what you want in a relationship. Always look at the good and bad. It is not okay to bust his car windows in if he breaks up with you but it is okay to ask Daddy to make it all better. He knows people.
- If you want a tattoo, think about it for at least a year. If you still like it at that point then it might be safe to get it. Give thought to how cool it will be in 10 years and stretched when you may be pregnant.
- If your hobby is photography, then buy a good camera. If it is running, buy a good pair of shoes. If it is singing, then buy the guitar. Spend the money on the stuff that touches your soul.
- Don’t start on the credit cards and learn to manage money early.
- Learn how to shoot a gun. For self-defense, for hunting with your Uncle and for self-confidence. We are county, you own a gun.
- Find a job you love and a job that doesn’t feel like a job. It is tough and it takes guts to do but don’t be afraid to chase it. It may not happen right away but it will. Stripping is not a job and accounting is boring.
- It is okay if you don’t get things right the first time, but learn from your mistakes and move on. Do not act like you are the only one on a tough path.
- Learn what good wine, cheese and shoes are. Do not mix beer and liquor and learn your limit. Puking in the bushes is uncalled for.
- There is no reason to ever try drugs. Period. You remember everything in your path to this point.
- Know how to change the oil in your car, fix a flat tire, and purchase a car. I know you think you have your Daddy for all of this but you should know it no matter what.
- Remember everything you do has consequences and most likely, other people’s feeling involved.
- Tip well, you could be that waitress someday.
- No one wants to see your privates or your boobs. Cover them up.
- Speaking of, learn to dress yourself appropriately for the occasion. Classy never goes out of style. When in doubt, it is better to be overdressed than underdressed.
- Do not be the queen of gossip. Try to stay out of the drama and remember that could be you as the topic one day. Karma is a bitch.
- Wear sunscreen and don’t go in the tanning beds. You are already Mexican baby you don’t need any more of a tan.
- A man should never honk his horn at you. You make his ass get up and come to the door. Occasionally he should be carrying flowers.
- Use “yes, ma’am and yes sir” to your elders for they have walked a greater path than you could even imagine.
- Travel as much as you can and learn the culture. There is a far greater life than this cornfield we live in. Always pack a swim suit.
Baby, this life is full of a million things that are hard. The older you get the more I realize how I can’t protect you from it all and I have to pray I’m giving you the best path to go on. I wish I had all of the answers to give you in life but I don’t. I wish I could walk every day with you and hold your hand but that isn’t how it works. Life is just flying by a bit to fast for me, keep your head straight and your chin up baby, no need to let that tiara fall.
I love you always.
OMG that is perfect!!! Might steal some points and give to my daughter!!! Mine is 14, just got suspended from school yesterday, her “best” friend hit her in the eye and gave her a black eye!! Hopefully this woke her up to that “best” friend!!! Having daughter’s is so hard!!!
Oh I feel your pain. I’m not quite there yet but I feel like those days are right around the corner. Learning who your real friends are is tough at that age. Good luck with yours and feel free to share this with her:)
This is PERFECTLY written. Could be a chapter in a book or something and such universal truths for any parent. I need to bookmark this for one day. Totally agree on cheese, wine, and shoes 😉
Thanks! You already can’t put Kraft cheese in front of the kid, she is completely horrified at such tastelessness.