As they say- If it can go wrong, it will.

Oh, hi little blog of mine.

I swear I didn’t forget about you.  I have thought about you over the past several weeks.

This should now be the post where I write about the big move into the house we have spent months building.  It is supposed to be a great, big, happy post about this next chapter in our lives and perhaps that is the exact reason why I haven’t written,  besides the lack of time, this has been the most stressful and least happy moment for us.

I could write out the story for you with all of the details but in the end I hate repeating the details.  Every little thing added up from the day we started building to only explode in front of us 12 hours before the movers were to show up.  We were given an all clear during our walk through with my the builder when in fact we shouldn’t have.  You see, there was an issue that we were told was cleared up, that only the builder could clear up, when in fact it hadn’t been cleared up and we could not get permanent occupancy to close.

We sat, surrounded by boxes in the apartment 12 hours before movers showed up and I saw my husband break down for the first time.  For the first time I worried about his sobriety when he told him it took everything he had to not drive directly to the bar instead of to the apartment.  The builder and him had an explosive argument on the phone and the builder crossed enough lines that my Husband was not even going to move into the house.  In that moment we were going to beg the apartment  complex to let us stay on a few more days while we found somewhere else to go.  We ended up moving in the house the next day anyways mainly because we literally had nowhere to go.

Boxes were moved, utilities turned on, appliances delivered and one issue after another happened.  The painters were still painting the front door but the movers need the front door off the hinges.  One truck  was stuck in the mud outside while the phone guy was complaining because he was told lines would be buried.  The husband had to work that day and all I could do was direct the craziness while my sister and another dear friend tried to help.  It felt like we were trying to put out a forest fire with cups of water only.  The whole time I was waiting for a call from the builder.  Something to let me know it was all a mistake, something with an apology, something that gave us a glimmer of hope and to this day it hasn’t come.

That night, once we were all  moved in, we opened a bottle of wine I had saved and it just didn’t taste right.  There was no exciting Facebook post, there was no first time home pictures, and there were no papers signed.  We stood with all of our stuff in a place that suddenly felt foreign because we now faced a horrible reality.  We may have to move out of this house.

The weekend continued into one horror after another to end with someone trying to break into our new house while I was home by myself.  I learned it takes the police 12 minutes to get there and even longer when the 911 sign hasn’t been put up.  I had to quickly remember where the guns were.  We were at the end of our rope and now I was afraid to be in my home.

We have spent the past three weeks in this house and seem to grow more disconnected to it each day.  We refuse to hang anything on the walls and we have a contingency plan put into place if we don’t get to close.  The only thing we have heard from our builder is that he wants us to pay him rent on our own house because we couldn’t close on an issue that is all his fault.  Quickly our rate that we have locked in will run out and then, well, insert plan B.  Move again. Find somewhere.  Hire a lawyer.

Our lives have been completely on hold while this fog of stress looms around us.  We are afraid to breathe or move forward.  We don’t have anything to move forward to actually.  It is a weird holding place.  We are consumed with the little things we are to do right now-watering the sod, emptying the Husband’s other home, and trying to organize our boxes without unpacking everything.  So we wait and pray.  We dig deep for hope and try to keep hold of what little faith we have left in anything possibly going right with this house because not a single thing has.  Perhaps 2 years from now this will all be a distant memory and a hard lesson learned.  For right now, it is really fucking hard.

9 thoughts on “As they say- If it can go wrong, it will.

  1. So very sorry to hear this. I had wondered where you were. This sounds like a terrible nightmare. I hope that is gets resolved quickly and you can start to enjoy your house. You had such dreams for it. Thinking of you and praying it all works out asap. Louise

  2. Oh my goodness, I had no idea any of this was going on. I had seen posts on Facebook but just attributed them to humorous little anecdotes (ie, the truck stuck in the mud). I am so sorry that it is not going how you had hoped, I know how much you guys were excited to finally move in. Hopefully this will be one of those stories you can laugh at later?…let’s hope.

    1. We keep thinking we will look back on all of this and laugh one day but at this rate it is hard to tell. I’m hoping we will come out of it on the other side unmarked.

  3. Oh hun. This same thing happened to hubby and I….we had had to get married in our totally unfinished basement because the house we built had turned into a hellish nightmare with the builder. All in all it took two years for the builder to fix it because that’s how long he had before legal action could take place…..and I mean he fixed things on the LAST day of that second year (probably just to piss us off). It was a horrid experience and we will never build again. I’d say for the first five years after we moved in it didn’t feel like “home” to us because of all the issues….we didn’t put anything on the walls or decorate either. HOWEVER, now we’ve been in this house ten years and love it…..the pain is distant and we have many happy memories here. The stress will pass for you too….hang in there and try to breathe. I know how awful all of this must feel for you and how disappointed you must be not to have your “photo finish” (we were too)……but as usual, life rarely works like that. Things will come together for you and if you’re insane by then, well, it’ll just add more “color” to your life. 😉 I wish you only the best with much strength, patience, and sanity to get you through.

  4. Forgot to say, someone also tried to break into my house on the second night I was here (by myself, of course). They tried to kick in the downstairs window, but when i turned the light on they ran away. I didn’t bother calling the police. I think I was so pissed off at the builder I was looking forward to beating the shit out of someone with the 2X4 I was holding!

    I’ve heard that it’s very common for new homes to be broken into because people are after contractor’s tools and the other new stuff in the house….and also, the crooks believe the house to be unoccupied. So now that they know your house is being lived in, you likely won’t have any more problems (at least I hope so!). No one has ever tried to break in here again.

    1. Thanks for sharing your story Lunar! What a nightmare. I can’t even imagine two years of all of this. I think I would have walked away! I know in the long run it will be as you say and I know it could be much worse. My hairdresser went into labor early with her 2nd child and was in the hospital the weekend they had their big move. No thanks! And I think you are right on the break-in. So far, so good since that incident. Although we had two pick-ups parked outside so I’m pretty sure the guy knew we were there:( Glad it has all worked out for you and your husband. Here’s to hoping we get to that point one day soon!

  5. friend!! I had NO IDEA it was this bad 😦 I am so so sorry. I cannot believe someone broke in. I cannot believe all the issues. Hang in there, ok? XOXO

  6. You have one major thing going for you that I did not have….you haven’t given the builder your money yet. That may motivate him to get his ass in gear. We discovered all our problems after we closed and he had been paid…..the builder could have cared less about us once he had his $$$$$. God knows if we’d had the option to walk away we would have done so. While that’s not the ideal option for you after all the work you’ve put in, you could chose to walk it need be….that actually gives you quite a bit if power!

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