First Look

The past few weeks I have been holding my breath.  Years of trying and you just assume something should go wrong.  They did loads of blood work and gave me a thumbs up.  The tests say positive and then you wait until that first ultrasound.  It doesn’t help we knew earlier than most people do.  When you watch every day and track everything, you tend to know early.

We were waiting for today’s ultrasound.  Six weeks, five days.  I was sitting in the waiting room with my Husband who was talking about work, trying to distract me.  I was trying not to puke my nerves all over the room.

Just call my damn name lady.

We kept telling ourselves to hope for the best and prepare for the worst.

She called my name.  We were taken to the room.  I settled into my spot.  A few minutes later there it was…a little nugget on the screen that looked like a million other dots I’ve seen on other friends’ ultrasound pictures.  But this one was really ours and then…heartbeat.  130.  I think you could hear us both exhale which was followed by a fist bump in the silence.  (Aside from saying my wedding vows, we don’t get overly emotional so there were no tears.)  The tech laughed and asked if we had been trying for a long time.  We must have been obvious.

There it was.  Healthy.  Everything looked okay.  She printed up a stream of pictures, gave her congratulations and sent us on our way. Just like that.  Sure, a million things can go wrong but for right now we are going to relax a bit and enjoy the news…..still not telling anyone else though.