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I’ve heard the story a million times, women who started to worry about their older children right before their new baby was born.  Call it what you will, the guilt factor, or the knowledge that life will never be the same for them. I never quite understood this.  I would always listen to the Mom’s concern but couldn’t quite wrap my head around it.  In fact, I didn’t even think that about Rebecca, until a few weeks ago.

I get it now.

The fact that our time was winding down with her as an only child was starting to weigh on me.  I haven’t worried about not having enough time for her but our time will change.  It won’t be the same.  We have had 13 years as her being the center of our world with no one else to worry about, now that is changing.  And not only is it changing in our household but my ex-husband and his wife are also expecting a baby girl a few months after us.

Rebecca is completely on board and happy with all the impending babyness.  She seems to show no signs of feeling left out or being replaced, as I’m sure most kids don’t.  It is a Mommy guilt thing, I believe.

This weekend we are having a last weekend for just us girls.  13 years of taking her to the pumpkin patch and this will be the last time it is just her and I.  From here on out there will be another child in the pictures, which sounds very exciting to me but on the other hand it is the end of a chapter.  It isn’t like we can’t go out and have plenty more one on one girl days by ourselves after the baby is born.  We can and will, which is the grace of her being much older than baby.  See how messed up this all sounds?  It is a mind game.

So what I’m saying is, I hear you other Mom’s of multiple children.  I’m sure this won’t bother me after the baby is born but right now it is just something to worry about.  So this weekend I will smother her till she is annoyed with me and rolling her eyes to be left alone.

How did you handle your second, third, etc child coming along?  Did you feel the same way?