This is 8 months

The eighth month has come and gone.  She has officially been on the outside as long as the inside.  How weird.

We wrapped up her eighth month with a family camping trip, in Kansas, at Eisenhower State Park, for a family reunion.  (Highly recommend the place if you are in the area.) This was Cora’s longest car trip at around 5 hours total and didn’t do too bad considering she hates her car seat.

We aren’t huge campers but we rented a nice camper and set off to meet up with the rest of the families.  We had an absolute blast and I have to say, camping with a baby wasn’t that bad at all.  Her pack n play fit perfectly in the camper, we had AC, her monitor reached around the area, her Go Pod once again became a lifesaver and she doesn’t venture off of her large picnic blanket so we were able to contain her fairly well. Also, gallons of sunscreen and bug spray were used.

While we had a tiny tub with our extremely tiny shower, I just showered while holding the baby.  Hilarity ensued is all I can say.  Water everywhere, shower curtain being pulled down and me naked in the tiniest shower alive with a slippery baby who thought this was the funniest thing we have ever done together.  My Husband was of no help as he laughed his ass off at us.

Elf

Good memories.

This past month we took her to the lakes, swimming, for the first time and it was a huge hit.  Thank goodness.  We purchased this baby floatie and it has been well worth the money.  She can chill in there for hours and it keeps the sun off of her.  We can happily float on ours right next to her and everyone is good!

Other general items- still crawling, pulling herself up, letting go of things, so close to walking, popped one more tooth (2 total now), starting to only wake once a night, and getting better with the jar food.  She says bye-bye, dada, mamma, and growls like a dinosaur on command.  Because that is an important life feature. We go in for her 9 months appointment Friday but I think she is around 18lbs and is currently in 9 month clothing.

We are still in the stranger danger phase.  When does this end?  Anyone?  She is fine going to me, Hubby, my sister and her babysitter.  Also, my ex-boyfriend who was at the family reunion.  Long story.  Otherwise, she lets everyone hold her for two seconds and that is it.  I feel bad for Grandparents and friends who really want to interact with her but I can’t force it and some of them have a hard time accepting this phase.

Otherwise, we are on cruise for this summer.  I’m really proud of how well we are sticking to our summer goals and really enjoying time together as a family.

How’s your summer goals?

Turning 34

This past weekend we celebrated my 34th birthday.  We celebrate in our household with a birthday week.  You get to call all the shots, have extra glasses of wine, choose all the activities and get full control of the remote because birthday.

It is amazing how a baby can alter or ruin all of this.

Saturday night my sister stayed home with the baby while the Husband and I went out for a lovely, expensive, over-indulgent dinner that lasted 3 hours.  Can I first say how quickly a glass of wine goes to my head with no baby in tow?  With baby, I can drink a bottle and never find a buzz because if I’m not careful that baby would take my phone and start ordering thousands of dollars in shoes from a foreign country I can’t pronounce.  Or something along those lines.  So I have to remain on my game.  Back to the dinner portion, it was fucking amazing.  And I ordered all the food and dessert and practically floated out of that place.

My 21 year old self was at a bar, in New Hampshire, taking shots and making out with a really hot guy, whose name I never quite got.

Like any normal 34/32 year old adults, we stopped at the grocery store for formula and wine before heading home, where I immediately fell asleep in a happy food stupor.

Sunday brought my actual day of birth which started with brunch with the in-laws and mimosas.  It all fell apart after there.  There was a trip to the beach that took hours to get to due to nap fights and other priorities.  The baby shit all over her car seat on the way there, which we were not prepared for.  Damn you baby swimmer diapers and my lack of an extra swimsuit. The rest of the day went from there with no chance to save it.  By the time we were home the Husband went to mow and I attempted, for an hour, to get Cora to bed.  Attempt being the key word.  At the hour mark we were both in tears and I sat there thinking, this is my birthday.  Rocking a pissed off baby and crying.

My 21-year-old self was sitting in the corner taking shots and mocking me.

I went to wave the white flag at my husband who got her asleep within minutes.  That made me cry harder.  She has been preferring him more nights over me lately and he was leaving town the next night for work.  I took a shower, poured a glass of wine and we finally sat down to our lovely meal at 9pm.  The baby promptly woke 5 minutes into the meal with a stuffy nose.  Needless to say, sleep has been non-existent the past couple of nights due to said stuffy nose.

My 21-year-old self didn’t have slept the couple of nights after that birthday but that was because she met Mr. Summer Love and had crazy sex every night.

34-year-old self.  No birthday sex because sleep.

But I do have the love of my life.  And a baby, who despite it all, is incredibly sweet in the middle of the night when she is sick and wanting to cuddle.  And coffee. I have coffee.  21-year-old self didn’t need that to survive.

Remind me next year to book a hotel room with the husband, minus the baby.

 

Those Weekdays

Monday afternoon I sat in the rocker in the nursery, rocking Cora to sleep with her bottle.  There was no fight, she was tired.  Her eyes were closed as she drank herself into another world of contentment.  I sat, slowly rocking the chair, and looking out her window to our front yard.  I realized I loved the way the tree shaded our front yard in the afternoon.  Something I don’t notice on the weekends.  I loved how quiet our neighborhood was during the week.  I watched the butterflies chase each other in the wildflowers on the front bank.  I looked down at the baby as she pushed the bottle away, shoved her binky in her mouth and settled, fast asleep, in my arms.

I sat there for awhile just being and watching the world, loving the calm moment.  Eventually I realized it was either I was going to fall asleep or I should get up and continue chores.  I slowly laid her in the crib and slipped out of her room.

That moment, that is why I knew I couldn’t go back to work full time. That quiet moment in my house, in her room, slowing down, and just enjoying the moment.  That was what I was looking forward to when I was pregnant.

The weekends are full of great moments too but these are the moments, her and I, on our own schedule and in our own world, that I love.  Those extra two days during the week are something I would never want to give up and it is time I will never be able to get back with her.

The funny thing is, she woke up 90 minutes later, a complete monster, who needed another nap, and made me want to pull my hair out.  That is called God giving me balance.  Can’t have too much of a good thing.

This Marriage of Mine

You know, I had this post about how having a baby hasn’t killed my marriage.  People warn you of that, how having a baby changes your marriage. Of course it does! So does building a home, losing a job, changing jobs, getting married, losing a parent, moving states and a million other things.  Everything that happens in life changes your marriage, not just having a baby.  If having a child ruins your marriage, well, you didn’t have a good one to start with.  Truth.

Here I thought we were doing fine.  I mean, we have our days and nights, for that matter, where we get snippy and annoyed with one another.  We have resentment when one feels like they are doing more than the other, waking up more at night, changing more diapers, working longer hours or has more snot on their shirt.  Our sex life isn’t non-existent, it isn’t what it was before but nothing that makes me worry.  We carve out time for sex, dates, talks that don’t include just the baby and the hubby reminds me that I’m beautiful and I make sure to smack his ass and tell him he looks good on the way out the door.

I thought we were good.

I thought  I was juggling this parenting, marriage, work, hubby crazy hours thing okay.

Apparently not.

Cue Sunday night.

Cue pure exhaustion from a baby with hand, foot, mouth disease.  Nights of no sleep.  Trying to make the best of Father’s Day for the hubby.

Cue wine that went straight to my head.

Cue a husband that made an off-hand remark that just snapped me.  Any other time I would have laughed. I took the baby for a bath instead and cried.

By the time we went to bed, well, I don’t know how the talk started.  We shouldn’t have had a talk like this when I was this tired and drinking but he kept going.

We went to bed with all these words and questions hanging in the air.  I spent the next couple of days with a sick, clingy, baby and he left to work out of town. This left me with time to be pissed, over think, be frustrated and annoyed.

We didn’t discuss it on the phone or via text because that is a rule of ours.  Serious talks need to be had face to face.  So when he came home last night, we put the baby to bed, handed the monitor to my sister and took off on a walk to hash things out.

One mile later, we were back on the same page.  We had ventured too far off the page from one another.  While I’m good about verbalizing what is wrong, he is not as good.  Mainly because if he doesn’t stop and think about his words, they come out really wrong and create more of an issue.  Which is what happened Sunday night.

A mile after that we were back to normal, catching up on the past couple of days.  We were back to where I knew our marriage was at but sometimes we need to stop and self check a bit better with one another.

We have chosen to be very mindful of having a marriage separate from being parents.  We don’t want to lose “us” in the day to day of raising a child.  Some days that is harder than others when a baby consumes a lot of our energy and time but we make it work.  But what happens in our marriage influences us as parents and that changes our family as a whole.

How has having a kiddo changed your marriage?

family

 

 

 

This is 7 Months.

I feel like 7 months if full of all the things.  This month may be the one that I have seen the most growth and change and I feel like it has all happened in the past week too!

Cora is still not a fan of baby food.  Every now and then she will eat sweet potatoes but anything else, she clamps her mouth down and shows zero interest. We try every night and basically throw away a lot of jars full of food.  One day she did decided puffs were not meant to feed the dog with but that she can indeed eat them.  And Mum Mum’s are a huge, messy, favorite.  I have moved on to giving her regular food which she seems more obliged to try.  Avocados being a favorite, mangos not.  Otherwise, she just likes her bottles.  This weekend she actually just started eating more than 4oz at a time.  I know.  I see other kids chugging 8 oz bottles but she won’t sit still long enough for that.

Due to all the busyness and not eating during the day, she still thinks the middle of the night is appropriate for all the bottles.  She still gets up twice a night, chugs them down and crashes.  I will say that it isn’t so bad because we are getting to the point that going down for bed and naps are so easy.  We rock her with a bottle and when done we set her in her crib and she puts herself to sleep.  No fighting.  Man, it all does get easier.

In the past week her first tooth has popped through, she took off crawling, and started pulling herself up on things.  When she gets ahold of your hands she wants you to walk her around the room.  Or if there is a toy to push around, so she can walk, she will do that as well.  She actually prefers to push around the diaper boxes.  I would bet she will walk in the next couple of weeks.  Yikes!

Then there is the planking.  I don’t know if it is from watching me do yoga daily or what but she gets there and holds her plank for a long time intentionally.  All. The. Time.  Other parents at her daycare have even commented on it.  She has amazing form!

Due to all of her crazy new moves, we officially had to take down her infant swing.  She could climb out of it (even while belted in) and was trying to pull herself up on it.  I posted a side by side photo of her last swing and her first swing. Woah, all the feelings right there.  This is officially the first month that I keep thinking to myself, slow down baby girl, time is flying.

She says mama and chases her poor puppy around the house.  We have put her in her little blow up swimming pool in the front yard.  She loves being strapped to me while we go for walks.  (I bought the Ergobaby by the way, best purchase ever!) We have also officially started letting her sit in shopping carts now like a big girl.  I also finally gave in at restaurants and let her sit in their high chairs.  All this has made our ability to get up and go just a bit easier.

Lots of people like to ask me about her schedule.  I can tell you that she isn’t an overly scheduled baby.  The one thing she is consistent about is bedtime at 7:30.  But if we choose to say, get 8pm reservations somewhere to eat and take her, no biggie! She goes with the flow.  She gets up between 5am and 7am, no rhyme or reason.  For the most part she is now taking three big naps a day or a million cat naps, depending on if we are home or not.  She takes a bottle when she wants one and we only wrestle with the food situation at dinner time.  I can say I am thrilled she is so flexible because we are on the  move a lot.

More than anything, she is becoming more and more interactive which makes it much more fun for us. I don’t feel as exhausted from figuring it all out.  I don’t question what I do as much, instead I just let her take the lead.  I think we might just be figuring this parenting thing out.

And because life is fun, we are heading into her 8th month with hand, foot and mouth disease.  That is such a joy.

 

Babies and Screen Time

We often have this problem when we go out with my Husband’s family of screen time at the dinner table.  We don’t get together often, birthday’s and other general celebrations.  But the other children (3 and under) are plopped into a high chair and immediately handed an Ipad with their favorite show turned on.  My poor neglected infant and, now 14-year-old, are not allowed such devices at the dinner table. Even my Husband and I have a no phone rule while eating.  Home or otherwise.  I sit in my chair and I won’t lie, I judge the crap out of my in-laws.  I’m pretty open-minded about other parenting but this is one I just can’t get past.  Am I crazy?

My 14-year-old learned how to act in a restaurant by sitting correctly, not wandering with food, not having a device other than the provided crayon and paper and if she acted up, I hauled her ass out to the parking lot to have her pull her shit together and not ruin everyone else’s meal.  We sat as a family and played tic-tac-toe or I spy and also managed conversation together.  I’m not saying it was always perfect but she learned how to be a human and have conversation.  I would like for Cora to learn the same thing.

The only thing I see in my in-laws kiddo’s is the inability to interact with others in public.  I know for a fact this is their normal at home procedure-eating in front of the TV.  Don’t even get me started on how I feel this creates eating issues.

Why are we as a society so quick to shut our kids up or stick them in a corner to be entertained?

Call me crazy, but we are following the recommendation of not allowing our child electronics, technology, TV, or whatever till the age of 2.  I don’t turn on Disney, Baby TV or anything else for Cora and we don’t have apps downloaded on our phone for her enjoyment.  Yes, our TV is on in the background when we are home but we normally don’t sit down to watch our shows till after she is in bed.

Isn’t the world around her enough? How much do you allow your children? Are you the family I’m judging at the restaurant?

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