The One Year Mark

When the Hubby and I decided to ditch the goalie we were going for a “throw caution to the wind” type of scenario.  We just figured we would wait and see and trust the timing of it. But the clock has slowly kept ticking and here we are, one year later and no closer to having a baby.

Apparently there is something kind of big about the one year mark.  It means something, it is a sign. It means there is more depth to the question asked by every family member “When are you going to have a baby?”

So we start wondering, why isn’t it happening?

I’ve been ignoring the reminder in my email saying I need to schedule another doctors appointment.  I know the doc is going to ask questions and we are going to have to have these conversations.  I just didn’t want to turn it all into a “thing.”  You know, I just wanted to not have all this “stuff” involved with getting pregnant.  I just wanted to have too much wine one night, have kick ass sex, and a few weeks later say “so honey, you know that one night with the bottle of Syrah I always drink too much of?….”  You know, what normal people do because if a 16-year-old can accidentally do it, why can’t I?

But then you go to Google.  Oh, Google.  There you can find plenty of people who will inform you that you are clearly broken if you have hit the year mark.  This is where I recommend you don’t Google anymore.  Instead I broke down today and made the appointment.  The doc is booked for regular appointments until December so I feel like I bought myself some time.

As a couple we haven’t had this talk yet. What happens if it we don’t get pregnant? What happens if there is more involved with this than what we thought? What if nature just doesn’t take its course?  For all I know there could be nothing wrong and it will happen when it will. Still, the Husband seemed uneasy when I said I booked an appointment.

I’m not freaking out yet but for the first time I’m putting the questions out there and feeling like we now need to put some effort into this. It’s a whole new category.

6 thoughts on “The One Year Mark

  1. oh shannon, *hugs*. It doesn’t sound like anything too crazy yet, and I would highly encourage you to stay OFF the internet when it comes to this stuff, because I have already convinced myself that we are going to have problems and everyone keeps reminding me I’m Mexican so I should have nothing to worry about…That being said, I wish I could have a much more laid back approach like you, because I am all about the planning, and the charting, and figuring out the birthday…I have a sickness really, and no we haven’t even pulled the goalie yet. Since you have a month or two before your appointment, why don’t you try and chart and for sure “do it” during your peak days?

    1. For some reason this is the one thing I have let my OCD not reign on. Probably a good thing. Normally I am the plan it out person. Sure, I would love to dictate my kid’s birthday but I get that is not going to happen. We have decided to start charting it out for the next couple of months to get a head start on what the doc will probably tell us to do:)
      I love that you use the Mexican excuse in ya for kids:) I had an inkling we wouldn’t get pregnant right away. Mainly due to the fact that there probably should have been a million times throughout the years when I wasn’t very careful:)

  2. Try not to worry…things will happen when they are supposed to. The best thing to do is to relax and stay positive. Have your doctor run a few tests to make sure both of you are good to go. In the meantime, tell the people who are pestering you about it that you will have another child when its the right time. End the discussion there because unfortunately, family and friends will unintentionally put you through more stress. Lastly, talk with your hubby. This is one area where you both need to be on the same page.

    1. do firmly believe things will happen as they will. That has just been how our relationship has gone but I hate to just wait years as the clock ticks too:) I think it is finding that happy medium of when to do something. The hubby and I have done vague talking but this weekend we did sit down and come up with a direction at least.

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